What blocks me?
Time, money, bandwidth
When we don’t believe we have the time it means we
1) are over committed
2) are attending to everyone else’s needs over our own
3) have skewed perceptions about what we deserve.
Overcommittment is widespread in this country and possibly the world. It is perpetuated by the economy and current business practices. It is more cost effective for one person to do the work of three. It creates a belief that if you don’t do the work of three people the company will find someone who will and we work more and more out of fear rather than loyalty or pride in a good job. Job satisfaction declines while profits rise.
Another form of overcommitment is with primary caregivers, you know, parents. Parents have a job for every child and if they also work outside the home, they have a job for that. A typical parent is a chauffer, janitor, nutritionist/chef, scheduler, den/troop leader, spiritual counselor/therapist, nurse and the child’s first and best teacher. They are on call 24/7 for no pay or material compensation. They know this and will be the first to admit that their children come first. Everything they do is for their kids. This gives little time for themselves because they don’t take the time to really evaluate what their child truely needs and how to balance those needs because they are spending time reacting to life rather than responding and co-creating their life. Responding to life means knowing your plan and and making your choices with that in mind no matter what life throws at you.
The second reason we don’t believe we have the time is we tend to put the needs of others above our own. This is true of parents. They will make sure their kids go to soccer, baseball and martial arts but won’t spend the time to get the training to get a better job or go to the gym. Employees that are not primary care providers will place the “needs” of the company over their own. The phrase, “I have to work. There’s no one else.” is a statement companies and managers love. It says, if you are salary, you are willing to work for less than you’re worth. Let’s think about this. If you are paid $50,000 a year and typically work more than 40 hours a week, then you are making less than $6.25 an hour. This leads us to question how much am I truely worth? Am I worth $6.25 an hour or $10.00 an hour or $20?
Balancing other’s needs and ours is never easy but it is possible. It requires the ability to say “I am just as important as my work and my family.” Then it simply requires being creative and flexible.
Finding Time or money implies that it is missing or hiding. Now I’m not an expert, but I’m prettying sure that although you can misplace money you can’t misplace time. Also, neither time nor money are capable of hiding. So logic would dictate that we are not looking in the correct places.. This is where the creativity and flexibility come in. If you want more sleep, do you have to stay up that late or get up that early. Do you have time for a midday powernap? How about exercise? Healthclubs are open at 5:00 in the morning and stay open until 9:00 pm or later. Or do you have a group of friends with free time at the same time as you? Start a walking or running group. Money is more challenging but not impossible to “find”. First start with what you’re spending. See where you can cut a few corners. Than look at your assets and interests. If you want or need extra $ where are likely places it can come from. Then take steps to make it happen. In the age of the internet the sky is literally the limit. We just need to be willing to try.